A calm and reassuring Joe Biden today told reporters that the plummeting value of soft contact lenses will be the thing that saves America from crippling inflation.
“Listen here Jack, all we gotta do is simple. Let optometrists take the hit, and then we all move on with our lives”.
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The news comes on the back of reports that in some cases online retailers are selling contact lenses for less than the wholesale price supposedly ‘friendly’ contact lens companies sell to OD’s.
An anonymous spokesperson from the contact lens manufacturer industry told our reporters that it’s a good thing that optometrists don’t make any money out of contact lenses any more because they can then spend more time managing the lucrative complications of hypoxia and keratitis which online sellers create, so it’s really win-win…
