For local woman Clare McInsey, her annual eye test is a day she most certainly dreads, as she yet again has to reassure her eyecare practitioner that despite her Trump shaped choroidal naevus, she really is a good person.
Each eye test begins the same way, with a helpful eyecare assistant querying her about any visual concerns or family history of ocular pathology. It’s only when she is asked about any previous ocular history, that McInsey has yet to find a way to answer without sounding either like she is totally incompetent at life, or a white supremacist.
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“Um yes, I do have some kind of lump on the back of my right eye. My last eye doctor said it was, um, nothing to worry about so, um, probably no need to check there…”
“We’ll make sure we do a very thorough checkup, including that right eye for you today Mrs McInsey, don’t you worry about a thing”.
“Oh…ok, thank you. I really am a good person you know”
McInsey’s determination to make a good impression has really ramped up this year, with her arriving 15 minutes early with a basket of flowers and freshly baked cookies for all of the staff. She also has pre-emptively left a 5 star Yelp review for the clinic using her real name.
Two minutes into her fundus examination, McInsey holds her breath as Dr Cliff Eastwood spends a large amount of time examining the far right fundus where McInsey knows her offensive lesion is located. But much to her surprise Dr Eastwood simply puts down his Volk lens, pats McInsey on the back and says “it all looks great in there, see you in 12 months” leaving McInsey to disappointingly leave the practice knowing that Dr Eastwood is either completely incompetent at fundus examination, or a white supremacist.
