Theme Park Adds Non-Contact Tonometry To Roller Coaster To Increase Terror

The GanglionBuster-3000 is a terror of a ride

A local theme park has made the decision to add non-contact tonometry to their roller coaster ride in order to add terror plus have the business re-classified as an essential medical facility.

The ride, known now as the GanglionBuster-3000 has been praised by adrenaline junkies as being a thrilling experience which really plays into the horror of both rollercoasters and even worse, non-contact tonometry.

Text Example

Donate to support CRONEA

For the price of one nose pad per month, you can join Team CRONEA and keep the lights on while we work tirelessly to bring humor to the otherwise sad flaccid lives of the eye care industry.
Click To Join Team CRONEA on Patreon

Glaucoma advocacy groups have welcomed the addition of the tonometers however have expressed concerns that riders will be asked to pay $19 for the result, or $49 for the deluxe family package which also includes a voucher for a plate of cheesy-fries.

Disney