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God Announces New Humans Will Come With USB-C Instead of Optic Nerves

In a surprise upgrade, all humans from 2024 will have USB-C cables instead of optic nerves.

Glaucoma specialists have cautioned that this may not be the panacea people are touting.

“We’ve all bought a dodgy cable on eBay and before you knew it, burnt your house down. Let’s wait and see what kind of sheath these things have before we get carried away.”

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