The CEO‘s of CRONEA and Essilor-Luxottica today announced a major deal to merge, thus forming the world’s largest optical company with freeform satirical news vertical integration.
Ceo of CRONEA, Dr Leroy Maverick, made the following statement:
“To our dear readers, there comes a time where every optometry company sells out to Essilor, and for us today is that day. Thanks to all of you I’m richer than Joe Rogan.”
News of the merger sent Essilor-Luxottica shares into a buying frenzy, with Dr Leroy Maverick momentarily having a net worth higher than Elon Musk’s.
Insiders say that Essilor had been working on a site to rival CRONEA for some time, however couldn’t replicate the formula for quality dank memes and optometry jokes which CRONEA has been producing.
